God Works in Mysterious Ways...

These past few days have been an emotional roller coaster for me as I was pulled into memories that had sat idle for many years. I have been continually awed by the events of the last few days.

Last week Saturday my mom mentioned she had seen a notice that an Edward (Bud) Barr, aged 61 had passed away. She saw the announcement at the beginning of the week but had not seen an obituary during the week. As we ate dinner together Saturday night we wondered if this Bud Barr could be the same man who was married to my Aunt Dawn. My Aunt died died 16 years ago and we lost contact with her former husband shortly after that at his request. On Sunday we found the obituary for Bud Barr in the newspaper and discovered that he was indeed her husband.

My aunt died a very sudden and unexpected death. At the time of her passing there was a lot of pain, sorrow, and mistrust among family members. Aunt Dawn never had any children and she treated me and my sisters as if we were her own. When she died there were several things she had told everyone she wanted us to have. Her husband was unwilling to part with any of her things. He refused our requests for old family photos, family heirlooms, or things from her past. This was a particularly difficult thing for our family to accept since my Grandma had also recently passed away and my aunt was in possession of her old photo albums, diaries, and many other belongs from my grandparents and great grandparents. Unfortunately, there really was nothing we could do about it so eventually we gave up thinking about these things and assumed we would never see them again.

After reading the obituary in the paper on Sunday I decided to contact Bud's two daughters to send them my condolences. I also mentioned that if they happened to come across any old family photos while they were sorting through their father's things that I would be delighted to have them rather than them throwing them out. I was overjoyed when one of his daughter's emailed me back and said that she thought she had some things I might be interested in seeing.

This afternoon I talked with his daughter on the phone for over half an hour. It turns out that Bud basically quit living life after my aunt died. He stopped opening his mail, paying bills, cleaning his house, and caring for his own basic needs. His family intervened several times to try to help him but eventually he lost possession of his home and his job. He eventually ended up in a nursing home sick with cancer and very much alone. Over the years he refused to let anyone touch my aunt's things and never moved any of them himself. When he lost possession of his house his daughter saved several of my aunt's things including photographs, wall hangings, jewelry, heirloom teacups, and a ledger from the Ladies Aid Society that my great grandmother was the secretary for with entry dates beginning in 1919. It turns out that several things including my grandmother's diaries and my aunt's doll collection were ruined during flooding. His daughter remembered seeing several items I asked about but had needed to dispose of them due to the water damage.

This evening I picked up 3 boxes full of her things and delivered them to my parents' house. We pored over old pictures, and marveled at the fact that we again had these things in our possession. My mother excitedly looked at all of Aunt Dawn's old recipe cards, Dad laughed at pictures which dated WAY back, and I once again tried on all of her old rings just as I used to do as a child. Those boxes contain so many memories. I cannot thank Michelle (Bud's daughter) enough for what she has done for our family. I can only attribute the fact that she choose to save those things over 6 years ago when Bud lost his house, to God. She did not know us and she did not know how to find us, but in her heart she felt that those things were important. I am so thankful to God that she did.